15. It's not uncommon for pack rats to "personalize their possessions identify with them, seeing them extensions of themselves. One pack rat defiantly sad about her things, "This is me -- this is individuality and you are not going to throw it out!"
16. At times the possessions are viewed akin to beloved people. For example, one woman said, "I can't let my Christmas tree be destroyed! I love my Christmas ornaments -- I adore them!" Another woman echoed her emotional involvement: "My jewelry is such comfort to me. I just love my rings and chains Discarding such personalized possessions could easily trigger fears, sadness or guilt because it would be psychologically equivalent to a part of oneself dying or abandoning a loved one.
17. In saving everything, the pack rat seems to have found the perfect way to avoid indecision and the discomfort of getting rid of things. It works – but only for a while. The stuff keeps mounting, and so do the problems it produces.
18. Attempts to clean up and organize may be upsetting because there is too much stuff to manage without spending enormous amounts of time and effort One pack rat sighed, "Just thinking about cleaning it makes me tired before I begin." And since ever-heroic efforts at cleaning bring barely visible results, such unrewarding efforts are unlikely to continue.
19. At this point, faced with ever-growing goods and ineffective ways of getting rid of the excess, pack rats may begin to feel controlled by their possessions. As one put it. I'm at the point where I feel impotent about getting my bedroom cleaned."
20. Even if the clutter doesn't get the pack rats down, it often irks others in the households who do not share the same penchant for saving. Since hoarding frequently begins in the bedroom, the pack rat's partner is usually the first to be affected. He or she begins to feel squeezed out by accumulated possessions, which may seem to take precedence over the couple's relationship.
21. At first, the partner may simply feel bewildered about the growing mess and uncertain about what to do, since requests to remove the "junk" tend to be ignored or met with indignation or even anger. One exasperated husband of a pack-rat client said: "She keeps her stuff in paper bags all over the bedroom. You can now hardly get to the bed. I tried talking to her about it but nothing seems to work. When she says she has cleaned it out, I can never see any change. I'm ready to hire a truck to cart it all away."
22. As the junk piles accumulate, the partner may try to clean up the mess. But that generally infuriates the pack rat and does nothing to break the savings habit. As the partner begins to feel increasingly impotent, feelings of frustration and irritation escalate and the stockpiled possessions may become an emotional barrier between the two. This situation is even worse if the pack rat is also a compulsive shopper whose spending sprees are creating financial problems and excessive family debt.
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