Things I wish I’d known when I was younger

things i wish i’d known when i was younger

most people learn over time, but often learning comes too late to be fully useful. there are certainly many things that now i know would have been extremely useful to me earlier in my life; things that could have saved me from many of the mistakes and hurts i suffered over the years—and most of those that i brought upon others too.
i don’t believe the romantic idea that my life has been somehow richer or more interesting because of all the times i made mistakes; nor the idea that mistakes were “put” there to help me learn. i made mistakes myself through ignorance, fear, and a foolish wish to have everyone like me, and life and work would have been less stressful and more enjoyable (and certainly more successful) without them. so here are some of the things i wish i had learned long ago. i hope they may help a few of you avoid the mistakes that i made back then.

1. most of it doesn’t matter. so much of what i got excited about, anxious about, or wasted my time and energy on, turned out not to be important. there are only a few things that truly matter to have a happy life. i wish i had known to concentrate on those and ignore the rest.
2. the greatest source of sadness and hatred(hating) in this world is holding on to past hurts. look at all the terrorists and warlike groups! they keep some event long gone in mind, or base their good reasons for killing on some supposed historical ownership of a bit of land, or the wrong done hundreds of years ago.
3. waiting to do something until you can be sure of doing it exactly right means waiting forever. one of the greatest advantages anyone can have is the willingness to make a fool of themselves publicly and often. there’s no better way to learn and develop. dare i say, it’s fun too.
4. following the latest fashion, in work or in life, is spiritual and mental suicide. you can copy the most popular idea of the moment; or you can be a unique individual. the choice is yours. religion isn’t the opiate of the masses, fashion is.
5. the quickest and simplest way to destroy any relationship is to listen to gossip. the worst way to spend your time is spreading more. people who spread gossip are the disease-carriers of our day. cockroaches are clean, kindly creatures in comparison.
6. every winner is certain to be a loser in due course. it’s great to feel like a winner, but don’t imagine you can stay there for ever. the worst is being determined to do so, by any means available.